Well, I had hoped that when the clocks went back recently that it would be to 1992 (see below!), before mobiles, Amazon, Netflix and influencers. When there were four channels on tv and the weekly wait to see the next episode of your fave series. When kids were what they were – instead of being assessed and labelled what they aren’t. When caramel could just be plain old caramel without the salt and no one carried around gallons of water everywhere they went. If it was 1992, I’d get all my kids ready for a trip out. I’d put the boys in their matching green, plaid shirts and Beth in her red woollen coat and little red beret and we’d go to my Nan’s and then all walk to Woolies on Tenterden High Street together for some pick ‘n mix and she’d buy endless multipacks of milky tea coloured tights. Nothing, NOTHING, really nothing was better than that. Holding their little mittened hands and Nan shrieking with laughter… “ooh, he is artful,” she’d cackle, as Rudi attempted to skilfully fish a Werthers from her handbag.

What I am wondering, is where home is once your kids are grown? After all, home isn’t just an address – it’s an emotional place we love and belong. It’s where we feel settled, safe, relaxed. Can you ever find that 1992 feeling again within just four brick walls? It’s a kind of loss (for some, not all) and a very odd thing because as hard as I try, I don’t think that what feels lost can be found. Maybe that warmth and peace belonged to a past version of myself and I grew into a hybrid who is stuck a bit in the past and a bit in the present. I just need to be patient…

The Hearties went to Mamma Mia – The Party at the O2 last night. I’ve been a few times and really liked it; once I’ve tested something and think the ladies would also enjoy it, I’ll book us all in! My biggest enjoyment is seeing everyone having fun together; an unexpected bonus of running the choir is that I became a kind of connector. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

It’s Bonfire Night and as I lay in the bath writing, I’m accompanied by the sound of fireworks outside. It’s rather lovely and cosy and definitely the best way to celebrate! I’ve got a satsuma to eat and last Sundays You magazine to read too… living it up!

The beautiful Rockits hub is gearing up for Christmas. We’ve gone all nostalgic…and back to the ‘90’s. It’s so cute! We’ve made a Woolies, a Little Chef and an Elves Workshop in the role play rooms. Next stage is to bring in our fabulous main Christmas area…it’s going to be……can’t say as it’s a surprise!

I stopped blogging for the longest time, partly because I felt I had nothing of interest to write down and partly because I lost a big chunk of my humour (and a bit of my joy) somewhere along the way. I was looking back at my posts from 2020 and hardly recognised the person I was back then. Of course, I AM older, much busier and generally a bit knackered, haha.

This year has galloped by so fast; it feels like we’ve only just stuck the Christmas decorations in the loft… two months and they’ll be back out! I’m still having to remind myself it’s 2026 and honestly, the only time I feel time moves slowly is when I’m forced to wait for something. A trip to A&E, a long queue in Tesco, a double length session with the hygienist… a far too long and mundane conversation. Those things all feel MUCH longer than they actually are and I either give up and physically leave or I mentally leave. I’m best left to my own devices. Regular days are spent alternating between baking and arranging songs; a cake goes in the oven and I scoot up to my micro-studio and do a few bars. Time never flies faster than when I’m recording and lots of cakes get burnt!

My boys are my biggest pleasure. Little Max, Rufus, Finn, Rexy and Noah. How is it possible they now range from nine to four – Noah has just started school too! We had a lovely summer, but I think my highlight was hearing Rex singing the Wombles theme song while I drove us to Wingham. Ollie and his tribe came to stay too and we had a little Dino party for Noah, bless him.

I am so thankful that my parents remain well and the family are all happy and healthy. My Rudi is settled after being so badly let down again and he now seems happy devoting all his time and love to Maxon. Ollie is Ollie – the same as ever; a loyal, dependable, hardworking, T-shirt wearing, fine man. The Hearties are rather brilliant now and we’re about to do this Octobers Think Pink and then before I know it, it’ll be Wintersong! We will of course dust off, Angels, or I’ll ruin Dad’s Christmas, haha.

We have been at the new hub for nearly two years! It’s not been easy, but it is such an amazing achievement and something all involved are so proud of. Well done Butsy, you go my girl! When times are tough, I always tell her that she is the one who will make a difference – she fights on to get Rufus what he needs and I know she’s going to succeed and change things for many other people too.

Love forever xxxxxxxx

I’ve not blogged for months and I’m contemplating cancelling my account. I don’t write as much because I’m busier and my days are very often the same. My weeks used to be made up of spontaneous outings and things that were worth writing down. I do still have great times and lovely things happening, but in a snap the weeks flown by and I’ve moved on and forgotten about it!

I was complaining to my cousin about feeling very under par and she sent me a video she’d found on YouTube. It was a bit boring and far too long and it took the vlogger an hour to say what should have taken a few minutes. Patience has never been my strong point. It was interesting though! The vlogger said that if you feel tired, fed up… unhappy, make three simple changes to your life and you may just start to feel better. The first was PUT YOUR MOBILE PHONE AWAY. I am going to do this at various times during the day. I struggle with keyboard warriors attacking those or things I care greatly about. It just winds me up and I waste my time replying to anonymous imbeciles and end up stressed. I persist when I need to resist. Imagine all those wasted hours every day, added up to make a huge block of never to be replaced time. Don’t even get me started on the idiots who think that unfriending someone is some kind of punishment – like a public flogging in the village square, haha. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE. Again – so true. I waste time dealing with people who drain me. Kind, positive, inspiring, joy bringers are what we need. They’ll help you chase your dreams… even the crazy ones! Your true Norths. No negative drains. The third point is a bit dull… GET MORE ACTIVE. Luckily, she didn’t suggest actual exercise, but rather longer walks and more fresh air. Three little changes.

I’m chuckling away to myself. Beth is used to me due to the fact I’m her mother and she knows how I think. I was just telling her about a song I’m about to arrange and I said, “I’m gonna explode the bridge.” She knows what I mean.. I’ll make the bridge in that song HUGE and I’ll push the harmonies wide apart to do so. If I want a song to sound more choral, I put more distance in the bottom and put the uppers close. I may not do anything as I should, but it seems to work for us.

Oh my goodness… I loved the documentary, Immediate Family (Prime). I never heard a bass player better than Leland Sklar. I am in absolute awe of these amazing musicians. In the mid 70s we were back living in the UK and I was listening to the music here; I missed so much American music that was brilliant! Xx

I believe that some things happen in our lives that can change us forever. Not necessarily in bad ways… but change us they certainly will. Pivotal moments that alter the paths we were on. Obviously, loss tops the list, but there are many things that change us. For me, having a brush with cancer, a few years on a relationship rollercoaster, the annus horribilis and the loss of good friends drained a lot of joy out of me, but I’m still smiling (although not enough that you can see my wobbly teeth). We are hitting lots of three year anniversaries right now – Noah’s birthday, Beth’s anniversary, Nige disappearing, Carl resurfacing and the hub is about to celebrate its third birthday too!

Ollie and family came to stay for a few days and it was lovely. The boys are growing up so beautifully – they are properly bonded with me now and plonk themselves on my lap quicker than Hugo can, haha. I’m SO proud of all my little (and big) brood.

A couple of weeks ago, I started watching, Jane the Virgin. It’s quite crazy; a bit Ugly Betty, very soapy, but it’s basically a telenovela – featuring telenovelas! I’m quite a determined binge watcher… but this was a BIG job. It took me back to lockdown when I watched all 15 series of Greys Anatomy (I know lots about medicine now). According to bingeclock.com (for serious tv addicts/insomniacs) it’ll take a few days to watch all episodes of the Jane series…. But I did it! All 100 episodes and I loved it and so did my colourful imagination! A great love triangle (even better than Moonlighting), sad bits, funny bits, lots of drama, a bit of singing, a super close family (like mine) and crazy plot twists. What was a nice touch was that chapter 99 was about the series, the actors and all those involved spoke about the process. Give it a go!

As time has gone on, it’s interesting to see the impact weight loss jabs are having. I have to say that I’m so pleased they’re being made more expensive – it will put some off who really shouldn’t be on them anyway. Some are abusing them, loving the feeling of “thin,” so they just keep craving a few more pounds off week after week. I am very pro weight loss jabs for all those with medical problems, including obesity. I hope that in years to come this kind of medication will help children like our Rufus who has PICA (the name comes from the Latin for Magpie) and problems associated with food and non-food items. I’d love to be thinner and dislike the blob that I am – but taking the jab set alarm bells off inside me. Maybe post cancer I just hate the idea of drugs and jabs? I developed a hatred for them, especially PICC line flushes which always left pear-drop fumes in my mouth. I look back thirty years to when models and celebs were painfully thin and I thought those days were long gone. Sadly, no. A load of skeletal remains grace the red carpets once again and these bones are the role models for the younger generation! They used to tell us to love our bodies and embrace our curves… but that was when dieting was hard.

Bond is going very well as are rehearsals!

Well, I’m still alive. Incredibly, Beth was invited to Walmer Castle to meet King Charles. This is not one of my usual jokes… she really did! Community Champions from within the Cinque Ports were gathered at the castle for a cup of tea and a moment with the King. Beth said he was extremely smiley, gentle and very friendly and asked lots of questions about Rockits. She had been worried about curtsying but there was no need as the King shook her hand instantly. What a wonderful thing to happen. I’m very proud of Butsy and all those who support the hub and everything we do. I was due to collect the boys from school but Beth made it back in time, so I stood down. She was excited to tell them about her grand adventure, but instead they cried as they expected a trip to the sweet shop with me and one said, “well, Paddington Bear had tea with the Queen.” Ha! Rockits Sensory also won two further major awards from the National Association of Play Centres. Our trophy shelf is coming along nicely…

In late June, the Hearties sang at the Sinden Theatre and raised well over 2k for the Celia Blakey Cancer Unit at WHH. It was a really good show, full of new songs that I really enjoyed working on. The Hearties sang like a dream and knew they sounded GREAT! I love it when I see them come to life, heads held high. With every event they have improved and really are something unique and special. I had the usual panic about ticket sales; I hate this! Every time we have an event we hit this horrible patch and Caroline and I sit and pour over ideas to sell more tickets – or discuss the prospect of cancelling the event if sales don’t pick up. Suddenly, lots of tickets sold, but there are always a few weeks of uncertainty.

I had one of my best ever Birthdays! I spent the day with my family and as it was a Tuesday, I had Hearties in the evening. A great day! Earlier in the week I went with Beth and Caroline to Mamma Mia, the Party, at the O2. I’ve been many years ago and it was even better this time! Such a fabulous interactive event. You are seated in what looks like a big Greek taverna. While you tuck into several courses of a lovely meal, there’s singing and dancing and a little acting going on all around the tables. Do go – it’s fantastic!

Went with the lovely cafe crew to Chinatown for a fabulous meal at Royal China and then on to see Book of Mormon. Parts of it were hilarious, parts a bit juvenile and some surprisingly good songs!

I’ve had a good hunt but just can’t find my inner sprite… I lost it some time ago. Maybe sprites shrink as we get older, so it’s not lost… it’s just withered away to something resembling a walnut. Is that it? Will I never again feel really super excited and inspired about something? Does 60+ life only simmer? Simmering is ok I guess.

Good film: The friend. Film. Bill Murray and Naomi King Kong.

Things I’m bored with: Drip cakes, Pentatonix, spider season, wobbly teeth, hearing about fat loss jabs, White Stuff.