It’s done! Two nights and two rather different cabaret shows. We added Friday this year so that we could invite our lovely Rockits along. As it happened we had around 200 guests in! Saturday was our more formal evening and sold out! The Hearties events machine didn’t disappoint! Everything was beautifully set up and the church looked splendid. Caroline and the stage/bar crews did a great job. Sarah Wickham made the tables look amazing AND an interesting fact is that she funds all of this herself with money she raises from running our cafes throughout the year! Rosina’s raffle raised around £1,500! Ticket sales were good so I’m looking forwards to donating a nice sum to Team Ben Hammond. The show was actually two in one – a first half of whimsical Wintersong, followed by a crazy Christmas Cabaret. Personally, I liked the programme and the Hearties sounded better than ever. Some very kind feedback from our guests (although Ma not keen on the Prosecco…I will blame this on Aldi).

St Mildred’s Church now closes for many months for lots of essential works, including underfloor heating and more toilets! We have been invited back in October to perform as part of the “grand opening” celebrations.

We missed a few of our ladies this weekend. In particular, Kate Clayson and her wonderful mum, Marjorie, who passed away yesterday. We were talking about Marjorie today at the hub and have such fun stories to tell of times shared with her. Vicky and Alison were laughing so much while talking about a performance of Don Quixote that they did with her… the mind boggles, haha. Im sure Marjorie’s on a stage somewhere right now. Our thoughts are with Kate and her family.

Ma and Pa have flown to a perfect new nest! It’s fabulous. Mum also managed the entire moving processing more or less alone as Dad was helping getting the new hub together. How amazing are they? They did it while unwell with this pesky bug too! That’s my parents – never a day off work sick and they never moan about anything. They now live in a beautiful little semi in Mercer Drive – close to TLC. A pretty road, overlooking fields. I’m so pleased they have found their forever home now, it’s so snug and pretty with a cute garden too. No idea how they downsized so much, so quickly! No more choir rehearsals around their huge table too.

The current wave of flu is doing its best to disrupt tomorrow’s cabaret. It’s always something – it’s December. We’ve had the Covid years, sickness bugs, partners falling from roofs – you name it! Some of the Hearties are through it and we’ve a few new casualties including Caroline. It’s a shame to be under par for events because we work hard to pull them together.

I’ve barely seen the children lately and I don’t like that. I didn’t see Ru’s nativity as I’ve been steering clear. He was a mouse and Beth said he spoke beautifully and clearly and was a star mouse! She didn’t video him as she wanted to watch and enjoy it. That’s right. Glenn did get a little snippet of Rufus the mouse for us though ❤️❤️❤️. I’ve got so much on that I have no time or inclination to get the Christmas tree out of the loft, let alone sort presents and cards. No chance. I’ll wake up in a few days and it will actually be Christmas Day and I’ll be totally shocked, haha. The kids will all be sat downstairs waiting for their presents and breakfast sausage rolls.

I am having moments of clarity re the crossroads I’m stood at. Without realising it, it dawned on me that I’m building her an army.

Christmas is wonderful and there are parts I just love, but for me, it’s also a nice shade of cloudy grey, haha. It’s been over two years since my life changed direction.  In that time, Beth has been married, Noah has been born, my very best friend was lost from my life (and I am honestly still grieving that huge loss), Carl came to live with me, Carl then got seriously unwell and is still recovering and has more surgery ahead, we opened the enormous new hub and we are now working our very hardest to get everything running smoothly.  I am surrounded by family and friends, but also feel a bit lost and needing a whole new direction.  There are many things I cannot talk about, but I would say that I have definitely reached a crossroads. I need to feel so many things that I’m not feeling.  How can you stop missing parts of your old life?  How can you stop missing your old self even though you know you are changed forever?   I miss the ease of my old life and my hermit ways.  I miss my London trips and lazy days.  Someone recently said that I should write down what brings me joy and what are the most important things in my life.  The most important thing in my life is my family – that goes without saying and nothing touches that or comes close.   Joy… well that is what I am struggling to find.  I get glimpses of it but I can no longer hang on to it.  Sarah says life just isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. Hhhmm.

What a week!!! The hub is going well and our little cafe is open all hours thanks to our wonderfully kind and willing volunteer crew. Several of us have come down with a very nasty flu bug, which is terrible timing as it’s also cabaret week, but at least we’re all in the same boat! I’ve tried to keep away from everyone to avoid spreading it further, but I’d carry on regardless if that wasn’t the case. I also now know how poorly the earlier victims felt and wished I’d sympathised more. Poor Rex is also unwell with it. The cafe crew have covered me, thank you. I had one day mainly in bed asleep and then have kept going (including a freezing cold trip to London) even though I’ve felt rubbish. I’m not one for laying in bed for days on end…I recall the very worst times during chemo when I had to give in once or twice because I didn’t have the energy to even sit up or talk. I’m stubborn, haha…I stood and baked cakes last night and restocked my freezer. “Here lies Max Wilson. She was as stubborn and stupid as could be and look where it got her.” Cabaret… here we come!

Goodness – who isn’t doing Ozempic (or other weight loss jabs?). Half the people I know are vanishing before my eyes. I’m feeling like I’m gonna give it a go. Of course there are the warnings about side effects, but let’s face it, we were all vaccinated against Covid without having a clue what we were getting! I’m pre-diabetic, have very blood pressure and lots of health issues. I am actually the intended candidate and may attempt to get a doctors appointment (more likely to win the lottery) with an actual doctor and tell them this.

Wolf Hall. Utterly brilliant, but I’m left wondering why anyone would get anywhere near Henry VIII unless they want to be shorter by a head! Fantastic series…

The new hub opened on Friday 29th November. …”and just like that…our first day is over! 98 children came to play today and it was a day full of joy and happiness. Thank you all so much for booking, I hope you all loved it just as much as I did.
We did it!!!! Beth ❤️”

“Huge congratulations to Rockits Sensory on their opening day today at Embassy House (1st floor) in Tenterden, opposite Boots. This will be Kent’s first fully inclusive play centre and family support hub designed to cater to children of all abilities, including those with sensory needs, disabilities, and additional challenges. Its mission is to provide a safe, stimulating environment where every child can thrive through sensory play, social interaction, and creative exploration.

Starting with just one room at East Cross three years ago, Rockits expanded to a larger unit near the Millennium Garden and now will operate from the first floor at Embassy House, offering even more space and services. Beyond play, Rockits serves as a vital community resource, offering support, guidance, and a sense of belonging to families across Kent. It’s a place where understanding, fun, and support come together, setting a new standard for family-centred care and play in the region.

A message to Beth and the team – your dedication and hard work have been incredible. Wishing you every success as you continue to make a difference in our community.”

“So bring on the rebels, the ripples from pebbles, the painters,” the cleaners, the dreamers, the fundraisers, the supporters… it’s been a crazy few months, but we’ve finally reached our destination. THANK YOU XX

25 Nov. On breakfast tv they’re getting us ready for the “party season with perfectly matched foundation.” I don’t think I’ve ever had so little to do that I’ve had the time (money or inclination) to worry about what foundation I’ll be wearing this Christmas. I think I need to write Christmas off this year and just try to get through it. The hub will be very busy and need all my attention while it’s getting on its feet and after that, it’ll need lots of work (and baking). As we get closer to opening, there’s no chance of sleep. It’s 4am and I’m working out what I need to do and trying to allocate time slots for it… there simply isn’t enough time. Sometimes, it’s tempting to pack a bag and leave the country, haha. An amazing effort from Caroline who has been in nearly every day since day one, painting and working. I wasn’t in then because it was too dirty and dusty, but once it settled, I was in every day and Rosina has been a brilliant help too. Mum and Dad are usually around (Dad is brilliant for his age and can still work for ages) and Glenn did a fabulous job on the night shift, along with some lovely friends – they got the heavier jobs done in the evenings. Beth is in when she can be and has been sorting staff, rotas, websites, utilities, tills, funding… safety checks and a million and one other things as well as looking after the boys. It really is a family affair. When I get home, I spend the evening finishing choir work. Yesterday I flew through the front door and straight up to my studio to do a score for Ave Maria. Crisps for dinner again, haha.

I’m trying to sort Christmas shopping online and asking the boys what they’d like. Rexy said, “Kong with a scratch and a T Rex and a Sonic toy.” Fast forward a few years and it’ll be “an iPhone 23.” I popped up to Dorking to see Ollie’s brood. I can see in just over a month that both of the boys are taller. Noah has started to talk endlessly and is totally loving, Night Garden. He kept showing me his toys… “look Nanna…”. I played lots of games with Finn and he amazed me with his hide ‘n seek skills, haha. Ollie has a new EP out too!

28 Nov. The final push before the big day. Rockits Sensory and Soft Play opens tomorrow. We’ve still a few lose ends to tie up, but I can’t tell you how hard we’ve all worked. When you see the new hub I hope you feel the love that’s gone into it. This whole thing has only been possible because of the support we’ve had with fundraising and also, the support many of you continue to give in various ways. Beth and I can’t thank our choir helpers, Caroline, Sarah W, Rosina, Karen O, Jane Turner, Sally and Sarah P enough. They have hung decorations, scrubbed floors for hours on end and hoovered for miles. My mum said to me that I have amazing friends. And I do. I felt so touched… I certainly know who my friends are. Enormous thanks and apologies for your aching backs and tired bodies… we couldn’t have done this without you. “We got by with a lot of help from our friends.” Now, Beth… onwards and upwards, you can do this. We’re right here behind you as we always are. Xxxx