Throughout the year Beth is arranging ‘twilight’ conferences for families, charities and SENCo’s to attend. At each conference there will be speakers and then a panel who will do a Q&A. The first conference is, “supporting families on their SEN journey.” As it’s the first conference, it’s quite a general one. The speakers Beth has booked have lived experience and the panel are the professionals who can give help/advise. It’s basically somewhere to gain SEN knowledge, for SEN families to meet others and to give them the opportunity to ask any questions they have.
We have support groups attending too who can give their info to families needing one to one support. So proud we can do this.

I was babysitting Ru. He’s both adorable and hilarious! “Dins – what time was you born? Like, I was born at 2018.” Me, “I was born in 1964.” Ru – “holy cow!!” Another conversation… “Dins… do you know… I know the password to my iPad!” Me – “that’s sneaky… what is it then?” Ru – “it’s rogger!” Me – “do you mean, Roger?” Ru – “No! I saw and it’s got a G in it.” This is very true. We laughed for a full hour. He then suggested we share a bowl of Coco Pops (by that he meant that I hold the bowl…) and while he ate he told me his interesting facts – “Did you know there were dragonflies before dinosaurs?”

The new hub is getting more and more busy. It’s starting to feel very alive, as though it’s absorbing all the joy it’s bringing.

I’m sat in bed and I keep laughing, thinking about this… A few days back I was at home trying to get some work done. Carl noticed some messages from Beth and then shouted, “emergency! Emergency! Environmental health people are at the hub!” Aaaahhhhh!!! I’ve been nervously awaiting this day even though we were definitely ready and our little cafe and kitchen is beautifully shiny and clean… but I was still nervous! I had my “home clothes” on… black ABBA velour joggers with cat pulls, orange bobbly jumper… flat unbrushed headphone hair… and I literally ran out of the door looking like a tramp. I was also SO nervous that I almost flew up the stairs… haha. I needn’t have worried. Marion was showing him our very impressive cafe folder and Sally had everything beautifully in control in the kitchen. I’m proud to say – we got a five star rating!!! Woohoo!!!! Woohoo!!! Brilliant work cafe crew! We smashed it! Xxx

I’ve still got a string of Christmas cards up at home which I’m putting off taking down, haha. I struggle throwing cards away, especially if they’re from family and close friends. The kids shaky writing and cute spelling (Ru wrote Zookey, for Suki.. love him), beautiful personal messages from friends…Beth’s cards which always say, to Mummy. Too valuable for the bin. This is why all my drawers and cupboards are bursting at the seams (my drawers are definitely bursting at the seams, haha). I keep all the school photos and outgrown baby mittens, favourite first books and even some driftwood that a long gone and much loved cat (Henry) brought in one day. I have Beth’s first ballet case with her little uniform and tiny satin shoes* in…

Brandi Carlile. A newish discovery for me. While hunting for choir songs, I stumbled on, The Joke (a song I’ve always liked) but I had never listened to anything else by her. She’s a good songwriter…seems a bit KD Lang, but also a bit Jane Siberry. I very much like the official video for, The Joke, as it’s full of ballet and closeups of pointe shoes. I’m a bit obsessed with ballet shoes and watch videos about how to prepare new ones before stepping on stage, haha. It’s unlikely the Bolshoi will ever need me, but who knows. If I hadn’t had this life, I would have loved to dance. I’m the perfect height and twice the ideal weight, which can only be a plus!

Party, party, party! Blimey last weekend was TOUGH! Loads of hub parties in – great as every penny is a tiny flotation device helping keep the hub afloat. Winter costs are high, but Beth’s got it all in hand. Ive been doing the parties – assisted by our amazing cafe volunteers. Caroline joined us yesterday as I had to create a big grazing table and needed a grape chopper/ham rolling/apple fanning helper. Thanks so much for freezing your fingers off in the kitchen. We are hoping the new restaurant below will hurry up and open as we will benefit from their heating, haha

Went to the Ivy at T Wells for Sarah’s birthday. It was very lovely and not overly expensive. We had arancini and then a fairly gigantic haddock fish cake with crushed peas… then we had creme brûlée and felt stuffed! Happy Birthday buddy ‘ol pal xxxxx

Saturday. I do get great satisfaction out of several aspects of the hub. All of these things were so lovely today… 1. Seeing Beth in her office which she is trying to make a bit girlie (she isn’t doing as well as she thinks as I stole her rug for the new, Home Sweet Home area). 2. Working in our little cafe with Rosina and Bruna was really fun – they are lovely to be around and both a bit mischievous (which I love). 3. Seeing the hub packed and three birthday parties today. It’s a good job we know the words to, Happy Birthday. We don’t charge extra for the choir accompaniment, haha. 4. Putting together the new, Home Sweet Home area. The idea was a little, cosy 1950s feel lounge – when I found the mini wingback chairs on Ikea I squeaked with excitement… and what’s more, Beth agreed and bought them! It’s a weeny area but has books and we hope will be somewhere our little ones can enjoy some calm time. 5. Receiving my latest Marketplace haul… construction, here we come! 6. We have a cute retro ride on rocket (not something I’d advise you to google). 7. Watching Rex wrestle the giant Siberian tiger.

In spite of having yet another cold, I’ve had a very good and productive day! I’m pushing on with the latest batch of choir songs (there’s now six on the go – but half won’t make the cut) even though I sound very bunged up and it’s hard to understand what I’m singing, haha. In between verses, I nip down and bake some flapjacks or brownies, haha.

Beth and I went to see, Wicked, at the Kino. If you mixed up The Grinch, Willy Wonka and some of the original Wizard of Oz, you’d get this film! Ariana and Cynthia sing everything live (as opposed to what they usually do in films, which is prerecord and then mime for filming) and they were brilliant. Ariana is tiny… if she loses any more weight, she will vanish before our eyes. This isn’t dilemma I face. I had a lovely rosé Prosecco there – I wish I knew what it was… just in case…

Christmas was a few wonderful days full of family. Ollie came to stay and although my house is small, we managed fine! My bedroom became their family room (I’d bought a new airbed for Finn) and I relocated to the lounge and watched tv right through the night. I hadn’t realised that my cats are nocturnal; they spent most of the night flying in and out via the noisy cat flap and Suki brought me in lots of Christmas presents (worms). I lay on the sofa trying hard to feel a bit Christmassy – I even watched a documentary about the making of the song, Last Christmas (George Michael and his friends are all truly kind and compassionate) and that didn’t work, so then I watched one about the making of, Do they know it’s Christmas (Bob Geldof etc) and still, I felt no Christmas excitement! I ate some Celebrations, cracked open a little can of G&T and then watched the making of the Americans (Ethiopian famine) offering, Feed the World (led by Jackson and Ritchie). If you ever need something to do for an entire night, I highly recommend this. It’s so funny to compare the two. Our British//Irish singers were very down to earth, some looked like they needed a good bath, some needed to brush their hair, some wanted to go down the pub, some weren’t great singers and some stood and chatted as though they were at a party. I’m sure they got nothing more than an egg mayo sandwich and cup of tea for going. The Americans were the complete opposite. Their singers dressed the part and had entourages with them and proper star quality writers and producers. They had backstage catering and lots of alcohol (which proved too tempting for one singer). Other good watches: The Penguin. Bad Sisters. New doc about Avicci. The Music of Bond.

I bet all the weight loss groups and meal plan companies are quaking in their boots. Why bother when you can do a simple jab and guarantee to be slimmer even quicker than you can say, Mounjaro. I don’t get why people are so scared of it – sure, it may have side effects, but isn’t it better to be a healthy weight than obese? Surely diabetes and high blood pressure are to be avoided? Didn’t we all get vaccinated against Covid without having a clue about it?

Beth had her birthday. 35. How can my little sparrow be 35? She was a tiny 6lbs and born 8 days late (which was lucky as she was due Xmas day). I guess we’re as close as a mother/daughter can be. We’re both stubborn and a bit stroppy sometimes (if I’m honest) but we are incredibly alike. Happy Birthday Butsy xx

A couple of years ago I lost the ability to dream for things. I think once we stop dreaming or wanting to achieve or change something, we may be done for. Now I’m just happy to get through a day successfully or manage to sleep for a few uninterrupted hours, haha. I really must stop eating cheese and get a life (and anyway, what day is it?). Really though, what do I want for my future? I stupidly question my purpose sometimes (I’ve definitely spent too long on social media), when it’s obvious. I’m a mum, so my purpose will always be to do everything in my power for my children and to grandparent all my little ones and as a daughter, I’ll be there when my parents need me. I’m a friend, often a rubbish one, but I mean well, haha. I want to see the hub flourish and grow. Although I’ve found it bloody hard work, it’s been so rewarding. Beth has done an amazing job and greets everyone with the best smile and always has time for anyone who wants a chat. I LOVE the ladies who volunteer in our little cafe. I really do. They are the kindest bunch you could ever wish to find and I always (limp) walk home with a spring in my step – these ladies have such big hearts. Who else would give up their time to make endless cups of coffee and stand in a freezing cold kitchen making toasties? It’s amazing. They serve cakes, wash up and tidy and always smile at the little ones and have a lovely chat with the parents. Penny, Rosina, Karen, Tracey, Tricia, Sarahs W & C, Bruna, Sally, Vicky, Alison, Ali, Liz, Lorna, Linda and Paula…you are all truly amazing. Then there’s our lovely Santas. I think Santa Roy may possibly be the actual big man himself, because I always feel better after a hug! Caroline is a great help and now quite famous as Lala the Elf! Beth is constantly getting messages from visiting families who say how warm and welcoming everyone at the hub is. The hub staff are wonderful – it’s a little community and community matters so much. It’s real and that is what the visitors are picking up on. It’s not just a business. I want a kind, peaceful and tolerant world for my boys to grow up in, so let’s lead the way.

I’ve been working on several new songs. There’s a Bocelli/Dua Lipa idea, a Josh Groban one (well done Sally) which has a David Gray feel, a bit of Brandi Carlile (who has no S) and I’ve pulled apart Frozen and am rejigging it. I’m toing and froing between then songs. As so many don’t make the final cut, I’ve no idea yet which ones will make 2025!

I was wandering along the high street and it was cold and drizzling… miserable. For some reason I cut through the back of Webb’s and on to Nige’s house. I knocked on his door. I knew he was in… but he didn’t answer. I knew he wouldn’t. It feels like I never finished the book – the last chapter remains.