I am in lockdown. This is because, A) I must, must, MUST, finish off the Beatlemania script (yes, there is a spoken bit too), B) I have suspected malaria, C) my psychotic ex-boyfriend is stalking me, D) I am ensuring I don’t venture out for food. Actually, only two of these things are true (I hope). I am rather baffled as to how to punctuate this paragraph – generally, punctuation confuses me. I should have paid more attention at school and stopped hiding out in Twidalls Café. Oh my God – I just realised that even at the age of thirteen, I was lured away from school by the smell of freshly baked scones. WHY did I just mention scones? I am starving and only on day six of my diet! Back to being in lockdown mode. I must stop procrastinating as I have a cauldron of song snippets on the go and I have to make a roast dinner for the masses AND I want to watch Peaky Blinders later. The only other thing I watch on a weekly basis is ‘Strictly.’ I have no idea why I love it, but I do. Generally, I’m an ‘on demand’ kind of girl and watch tv late into the night. I was temporarily upset that Darcey B. has left, BUT then one of the dancers got injured and had to pull out. Surely, my time has come! I will no longer be on the reserves list! I will expect their call today and pack a little case with my essential dancers kit in. All the dancing will help my diet – I hope they give me cellulite-busting tights, as my thighs look as bumpy as a plate of couscous! I will not only win Strictly, but also Giddy Up!

I feel 2020 is going to be a good year. Tentertainment returns, along with The Rockits Rockin’ Tea Tent (two days of cakes, Pimms and music inside a huge marquee) and we already have others ideas in the pipeline. Then, I also have my reconstructive surgery to look forward to! On top of this, I also have my Nanny Daycare duties – without my guidance, my grandchildren may grow up feral and live on Wotsits (just like me). I may be going slightly senile. Today, I went out in totally different shoes! Not even the same type, just a similar colour

If I do ever get some free time in the years to come, I would like to learn the cello. We do have a lovely cello as Busty played it while at Sutton Valence School. She was never brilliant at it, but it was a condition of her music scholarship that she study a second instrument (piano being her first). There are few things I find funnier than a badly played string instrument. Oh dear – I used to go to all the school orchestra performances and I would honestly be laughing from start to finish. The more I tried not to laugh, the worse it became and then, there would always be a VERY bad violin solo. I felt so sorry for the proud parents as I howled hysterically throughout. I REALLY tried not to laugh, I would bite my cheek so hard that it would bleed; I used to try and pretend I was looking for something hidden deep in my handbag, or I would study the programme as though I was partially-sighted.

Say Something. Butsy was singing with me the day I put this together. I wanted something very angelic and choral. It’s got some nice harmonies…